aunt pammie - great neighbor and dear friend

i was 29 years old when i met pammie in 2005.  i had just bought my first condo, #505 in north brook II, and her door, #501, was only 10 steps away. i had lived in the northern virginia suburbs for past 5 years, where neighborliness meant being polite - a wave and a head-nod on the way to the car.  i expected no different in DC.   fortunately, i had moved into a very special place. 

on my first night in northbrook II, there was a welcome note at my door accompanied by a bottle of "good, not great" wine.  i introduced myself the next day to the charming lady next door who knew everyone and immediately felt welcomed.  the transformation from condo to home had begun.  over the next 5 years, a steady stream of gifts were left at doorsteps and, at some point, she went from a neighbor to a friend to part of our family, our "aunt pammie".

though i think she liked me initially, she definitely hit it off with luke, my orange tabby. luke, like all her cats, could do no wrong ... even when he most certainly did wrong: like eat her plants or scratch her furniture.  her apartment was the playground and hotel for many cats in the building.  as such, she kept cat toys and food dishes in her apartment.  once, the cable man came to fix her TV.  seeing the cat paraphenalia, he said "i'd better shut the door so the cat doesn't get out."  without thinking, pammie said "oh, that's okay, i don't have a cat." we laughed imagining the thoughts running through his head. she joked that it would be the last time that particular comcast repairman paid her a visit. 

when i'd open my door, luke would make a bee-line for pammie's dooralbacore there was abundant albacore tuna, toys, and a dearth of rules.  note that i was eating the standard-grade tuna at the time but pammie saw to it that my cat was eating the good stuff.  when i went away for the holidays, luke would stay w/ his aunt pammie, provided there was "vacancy." if not, she would dote on him in my apt, leaving eloquent notes detailing his wonderful behavior.

pammie was the best neighbor.  she had keys for most condos on the 5th floor, including mine, which was great because i locked myself out on a bi-weekly basis. she always smiled when she gave my keys, except at 7am, when she'd just crack the door and stick the keys out (clearly i had woken her up).  she was fluent in a number of languages, including spanish. she always let the cleaning lady, evelyn, in to my place while i was at work and would often call me the day before to remind me evelyn was coming.  once, when luke was confined to the bathroom for a prolonged stretch for potty training, pammie tried to explain the situation to evelyn. unfortunately, pammie succeeded in explaining that matt (me) was locked in the bathroom for a few weeks.  he is not to be let out, no matter how much he cries and screams.  one imagines the look of confusion on poor evelyn's face before pammie set the record straight.

inter-apartment commerce flourished between #501 and #505.  we established a 2 person cupcake club. whenever one of us went to the grocery, we'd split a 6 pack of mini chocolate cupcakes (she preferred giant to harris teeter bc of the icing).   sundays meant $5 rotisserie chickens from harris teeter, which we'd usually split.  winter colds meant the sick person got fresh-squeezed orange juice.  pammie gave us an electric juicer for christmas 2010 and said she expected a hefty return on investment.  

her favorite was the pumpkin crunch cake that my wife, cath, made every thanksgiving.  each year, cath made one for our family and one for aunt pammie, who said her sweet tooth would  wake her in the middle of the night to satisfy the crunch-cake cravings.  

we shared a love of the Marine Corps as our fathers were both leathernecks.  Her father authored a field manual that my brother, Major William Fenwick, a helicopter pilot in the Marines, used in his training.  When the HBO mini-series, "the Pacific", about the Marine battles in WWII, aired, she came over every sunday for 10 weeks to watch.  cath would make dinner, pammie,  despite our objections, would bring dessert.  over dinner, pammie would fill us in on the background of each episode, displaying her vast knowledge of history and wonderful story telling.  fiercely loyal, she had harsh words for the US Navy after they left the Marines stranded on Guadalcanal and, of course, for the enemy combatants.

last summer, she came with the Fenwick family to the Marines barracks at 8th and I to watch the Sunset Parade.  she loved the pomp and circumstance, being around the young Marines and watching the show. my mom noted tears in her eyes during the ceremony.

despite our the differences and political ideologies, she was my good friend and, when i did catch her esoteric references, we laughed often. "ahoy!" was our greeting when we called the other.  she was #7 and #8, house and cell, on my speed dial, so often did we talk.

cath and i have been touring europe since june and, largely at pammie's urging, we'll head to africa in november.  she begged us to see the serengetti while it still existed as it had made a profound impact on her during her stay in tanzania.  

and we feel her now with us now on our trip.  in berlin, we stayed with a northbrook friend, elizabeth. it was pammie, of course, introduced us and subtlely pointed out all the things we had in common.   we think of pammie when we see the all the stray cats in greece (she would try to feed them all) and the moonflowers on the roadside, which she gave us every summer.  we loved her very much and can't imagine northbrook w/out her.  
 
- matthew fenwick, friend and neighbor

Head of the Northbrook Family

Northbrook II is a special place to live. You feel part of a family that takes care of each other. Pammie was the head of our Northbrook family who could always be counted on to have a spare key to your place, sign for packages, come over for dinner and rave about the food, have a witty story to share. She had a contagious spirit about her that shone threw and drew people in. 

She took care of everyone, and was especially good to my husband, Matt, and I who lived across the hall from her (Matt for over 6 years, and I for the past 3). No less than once a week we'd find a treat from Pammie at our front door. It was always something sweet - usually cupcakes, bakery goods or, my favorite, meringue cookies. Pammie made the best meringue cookies. I'll never eat another one without thinking of her. Freshly-squeezed orange juice was another specialty of hers and would always appear if either of us was feeling a bit under the weather. She even gifted us an electric orange juice maker in case we needed some when she wasn't around. And also so we could make her some. :) One of the most unexpected and special things she did for us was just after our wedding. We came home the day after to find the 5th floor hallway absolutely enchanting. Pammie had arranged for over 100 white helium balloons to be floating in the hallway! It was magical to walk into and we were incredibly touched.

Pammie was so kind and thoughtful - it's hard to pick from among the hundreds of gestures she made and ways she took care of us over the years. These few examples don't do justice to the extent of the care and love she showed us. She was the best neighbor anyone could dream of - she was part of our family. Pammie was so good to us, so good to many living in Northbrook. She has left a tremendous impact on us and will be sorely missed. Our life is better for having had her in it for at least a little while.

- Cathy Fenwick, friend and neighbor

Pammie made me feel welcome

I was new to DC and a holiday orphan when Sue Decker invited me to join a group of friends for a winter solstice feast. When I arrived, she ushered me into Pammie's apartment, reminding me to leave the door open, like hers across the hall, so the cats could travel back and forth.

Pammie greeted me with a strong handshake and lost no time in making me feel that I was welcome and that this was exactly the right place for me to be. She was filled with energy and I could tell immediately that this was a woman with stories galore. I had so much fun. We sat at her long table into the wee hours, sharing fabulous food and much laughter.

She was an amazing person with phenomenal spirit who created so much good around her. I feel privileged and lucky to have met her.